I literally spent all morning (well, a couple of hours, anyway) Doing Other Things. I read for a while (finished The Two Towers, on to The Return Of The King). I looked up a bunch of LOTR-related terms, characters, trivia (‘kine’ is cows, y’all!). I read some of the appendices for lols and funsies. I got inspired, opened my computer, did a few organisational things in my story files and took a couple of notes of things that seem like they’ll inspire future stories. I reread an old story-start. I poised myself to write…….
…And suddenly my lack of water, which I’d been successfully ignoring for hours, was pressing. The office door that kept tapping in the wind for the past quarter hour desperately needed closing. The sleeping bag in the laundry doorway was the perfect missing piece to top the machine up to a full load of washing, which needed to be put on right away. And while I was there, the laundry sink was filthy and needed cleaning, and the mushroom kit nearby needed watering.
OMG, reader: can we SEE the self-sabotage there at work?!!? I have long suspected myself of this, of course, but rarely has it been so abjectly blatant.
At which point, obviously the solution was to blog about it so as to mark this moment and hopefully guard against it in the future – absolutely not another method of avoiding writing! lol.
Of course, as was written somewhere in all the things I’ve read so far today, you can’t fight an enemy you refuse to acknowledge, so here, at least, is that: I am self-sabotating myself out of writing, even as I constantly wish to be spending more time on writing, and finishing more.
And thus having named him, I ride forth now to conquer: Imma go do some words, y’all. I’ll report back in the comments if I was successful <3
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